The silence was so loud that it woke me up out of my sleep.

The thoughts in my head that were keeping me company just stopped…

So, I reached for my phone thinking social media could deafen the silence that had surrounded my room. With nothing, I closed my phone and reverenced His presence.

I couldn’t ignore it anymore.

For the last two weeks, I’ve placed our time together on the back burner–knowing that I would come back once I did what I though was necessary.

Every bit of those 14 days were filled with anguish and fear.

Fear of what lied ahead.

Fear of taking the next step.

I should have stayed with Him instead of lusting for the world’s gift. I should’ve appreciated the gift that was already given to me.

In ’99, I was baptized. My little cousin and I decided to take that step. I was 8 and she was 6. Too young to understand the symbolic meaning of being dipped, I wonder should I do it over.

Will I take it more serious now?

Will I understand the relevance of being submerged in again?

I need to be renewed. My faith is still the same. How can I grow in His purpose playing these same ol’ games?

Discipline is what I need.

Choosing a side and sticking with it.

Time is of the essence and I can’t even decide.

“Make up your mind”, I here a voice say…then my alarm sounds.

Time to start this day anew, will I decide?

Which will I choose?

–with a capital M


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